Iran Threatens to Attack U.S. Tech Companies Starting April 1 (gizmodo.com)
from return2ozma@lemmy.world to world@lemmy.world on 31 Mar 20:07
https://lemmy.world/post/45000460

#world

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T00l_shed@lemmy.world on 31 Mar 20:08 next collapse

Its fair game I guess.

jordanlund@lemmy.world on 31 Mar 20:40 next collapse

“Residents within a one-kilometer radius of these terrorist companies across all countries in the region are also urged to evacuate and move to safe locations.”

Americans: “The fuck is a ‘kilometer’?”

Also Americans: “The fuck is a ‘radius’?”

saltesc@lemmy.world on 31 Mar 22:09 next collapse

There’ll be like two actual Americans there, but the rest of the workforce won’t explain it to them because they’re sick of everything being compared to “back home” all the time.

finallymadeanaccount@lemmy.world on 01 Apr 06:50 next collapse

Also Americans: “Move?! You fascist! I’m tired of being harrassed by the fitness movement! I have the Constitutionally-protected right to sit and remain passive, you woke Communist Socialist!”

Sculptor9157@sh.itjust.works on 01 Apr 15:27 collapse

Pass the ranch dressing, please.

toad@sh.itjust.works on 01 Apr 16:47 collapse

Interesting that they put their data centers near civilians population. Wouldn’t that make them human shields?

tightwad@lemmy.world on 31 Mar 20:45 next collapse

US: “You won’t attack us.” Iran: “April fools bitches.”

scytale@piefed.zip on 31 Mar 20:48 next collapse

Offices in the middle east, in case you’re like me and thought they were talking about stateside offices.

tyler@programming.dev on 31 Mar 21:52 collapse

I thought they were talking about cyber attacks, which honestly would put much more pressure on the US government I think.

backalleycoyote@lemmy.today on 01 Apr 13:53 collapse

On April Fools Day? I’m expecting mild pranks, like TP’ing Bezo’s house, ding-dong-dash a Elon’s, and maybe a few car bombs at the data centers.

DaddleDew@lemmy.world on 31 Mar 20:49 next collapse

Oh no. Please. Not NVidia, or Meta, or Amazon, or Google, or Apple, or Palantir… Oh and don’t forget… Uh, I mean not Mircosoft.

i_am_not_a_robot@discuss.tchncs.de on 31 Mar 22:49 next collapse

Microsoft is a huge liability. They’ve forced companies and home PC users to be needlessly dependent on their cloud services to be able to do just about anything. They own the hugely popular GitHub and NPM developer platforms, and indirectly control other developer platforms through GitHub integrations. They’re one of the major cloud service providers. They have a system that forces home and small business PCs all over the world to execute arbitrary code. They’ve been replacing their developers with incompetent AI systems. A major Apple or Google attack has the potential to break nearly all mobile devices, but a major Microsoft attack could cripple businesses everywhere.

Facebook and Palantir on the other hand could just disappear off the internet and we’d be better off.

Smoogs@lemmy.world on 01 Apr 15:25 next collapse

Glad I went Linux and moved house to the berg

wonderingwanderer@sopuli.xyz on 01 Apr 16:21 next collapse

Laughs in Linux

toad@sh.itjust.works on 01 Apr 16:45 collapse

Any open source project that still use github should be boycotted in my book. That simply doesn’t respect the licence.

i_am_not_a_robot@discuss.tchncs.de on 02 Apr 02:44 collapse

What does licensing have to do with it?

toad@sh.itjust.works on 02 Apr 07:15 collapse

Well if it’s on github it’s not open.

patruelis@lemmy.world on 31 Mar 23:18 next collapse

I concur, please levea the big tech alone, they are doing so much good for the world, cogh cogh, I meant for shareholders.

Bubbaonthebeach@lemmy.ca on 01 Apr 00:24 collapse

X. Surely X is a Tech company. Tesla too. They are as much tech as automobile.

victorz@lemmy.world on 01 Apr 13:31 next collapse

All EV manufacturers are as much tech as automobile today, I would argue.

toad@sh.itjust.works on 01 Apr 16:45 collapse

I mean automobile is a technology

[deleted] on 31 Mar 20:49 next collapse
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TachyonTele@piefed.social on 31 Mar 21:19 collapse

The assets they have in the middle east, not on american soil.

someguy3@lemmy.world on 31 Mar 20:58 next collapse

Many U.S. tech companies have offices in Jerusalem, Tel Aviv, and Abu Dhabi, which could become targets of Iranian drone and missile attacks if the country follows through on its threat.

3abas@lemmy.world on 31 Mar 21:29 collapse

Microsoft has offices in Qatar, Dubai, SA, Bahrain, Oman, Kuwait, and more I’m sure. Oracle also has offices across the region.

These come to mind, but there are many other companies I’m sure.

riskable@programming.dev on 31 Mar 20:59 next collapse

Yet another really good reason to work from home.

<img alt="old timey propaganda poster similar to the “when you ride alone you ride with hitler” poster except it says “when you work in the office you work for Iran. Work from home today!”" src="https://programming.dev/pictrs/image/0c6aeee4-aec6-431a-a7ee-34b9f626a34b.png">

If Oracle was on the list, they’d tell their employees to come into the office anyway.

bitjunkie@lemmy.world on 31 Mar 21:02 next collapse

Well all but about 30k of them

Taleya@aussie.zone on 31 Mar 21:53 collapse

Dodged a bullet

owsei@programming.dev on 01 Apr 03:01 collapse

most likely a bomb

TwilitSky@lemmy.world on 31 Mar 21:48 next collapse

Probably ask them to stand in front of the building.

plant@lemmy.dbzer0.com on 31 Mar 21:57 next collapse

No more water for you for the rest of the week

turdburglar@piefed.social on 01 Apr 02:46 next collapse

it is considered rude to show ai slop to other humans

Tollana1234567@lemmy.today on 01 Apr 06:21 next collapse

they just cut 30k employees, freeing up money for more data-centers.

athatet@lemmy.zip on 01 Apr 17:35 collapse
Godric@lemmy.world on 31 Mar 21:20 next collapse

April Fools! <img alt="" src="https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/9a6d54e8-747c-446e-b0ce-988f67e227ab.jpeg">

Thteven@lemmy.world on 31 Mar 21:27 next collapse

<img alt="" src="https://c.tenor.com/J387GbZxzFAAAAAC/tenor.gif">

apftwb@lemmy.world on 31 Mar 21:36 next collapse

How difficult would it be to smuggle and assemble a variant of the Shahed drone into North America? Dissembled and separated, it would look like lawn mower parts, sheet metal, and ewaste.

Hegar@fedia.io on 31 Mar 20:52 next collapse

Iran could win the hearts and minds of americans by feeding bezos shahed for breakfast.

rogsson@piefed.social on 31 Mar 22:15 next collapse

Actually this might be the best news I’ve ever heard come out of that country

xSikes@feddit.online on 31 Mar 22:29 next collapse

Do it, I dare you. Seriously though, take them down because our government won’t.

TheFrirish@tarte.nuage-libre.fr on 31 Mar 22:31 next collapse

Don’t threaten me with a good time

Melvin_Ferd@lemmy.world on 31 Mar 22:46 next collapse

Iran could really fracture the country if it chooses it’s target strategically

Tollana1234567@lemmy.today on 01 Apr 06:20 collapse

they seem to be doing a good job in the middle east, targeting other ME countries had made them question thier reliability form the USA, they saw no protection/or retribution against IRan once thier missles start targeting oil infrastructure.

gedaliyah@lemmy.world on 01 Apr 00:26 next collapse

April 1 - “lol check out this silly thing that Google maps is doing!”

April 2 - ( ˶°ㅁ°)

OldChicoAle@lemmy.world on 01 Apr 00:33 next collapse

Please do it

nutsack@lemmy.dbzer0.com on 01 Apr 01:56 collapse

no don’t do it

OldChicoAle@lemmy.world on 01 Apr 17:30 next collapse

Do it harder

nutsack@lemmy.dbzer0.com on 01 Apr 20:39 collapse

no stop

athatet@lemmy.zip on 01 Apr 17:33 collapse
morto@piefed.social on 01 Apr 01:41 next collapse

So people will think the news about it are april 1 jokes. Pure genius

FanciestPants@lemmy.world on 01 Apr 03:32 next collapse

Going to be checking Google maps for the Gulf of America Iran in the morning.

MrSulu@lemmy.ml on 01 Apr 04:40 next collapse

Finally a news story with multiple reasons for a cheer and support.

Tollana1234567@lemmy.today on 01 Apr 06:18 next collapse

he can start by targetting the datacenters.

BeMoreCareful@lemmy.world on 01 Apr 13:19 collapse

That could be a huge double edged sword.

On the one hand less propaganda, on the other less documentation.

NocturnalMorning@lemmy.world on 01 Apr 15:36 next collapse

That seems like a win-win to me.

moonshadow@slrpnk.net on 01 Apr 17:11 next collapse

Propaganda is a lot more dependent on centralization than documentation, and though I get that their power is tempting change will not be made with the tools of our oppressors

athatet@lemmy.zip on 01 Apr 17:34 next collapse

They aren’t keeping any documentation.

roserose56@lemmy.zip on 02 Apr 08:46 collapse

50% if fediverse would go away lol

brown567@sh.itjust.works on 01 Apr 12:17 next collapse

<img alt="" src="https://sh.itjust.works/pictrs/image/2be1c7ad-6b49-4cd2-9cbe-66e75716cde3.jpeg">

Tylerdurdon@lemmy.world on 01 Apr 13:04 next collapse

Aught to make for a fun April fools day.

merdaverse@lemmy.zip on 01 Apr 15:48 next collapse

AWS has had major outages in UAE and Bahrain since 1 March. That’s a good start!

Wilco@lemmy.zip on 01 Apr 17:39 next collapse

Fine. But you better not target our health insurance companies … I mean it. No drone attacks on them or any multibillion dollar corporations or the US public will shrug and keep going on.

DarkFuture@lemmy.world on 01 Apr 19:00 next collapse

You can tell America is in a pretty bad place when Americans aren’t too broken up about this development. Or actively cheering it on.

Taleya@aussie.zone on 01 Apr 21:49 collapse

Well they fucked up the helium so…