Just keep going to spite them, out of pure stubbornness. Refuse to join the rest in burning down the planet. Fuck them all.

Sounds rough, and I agree the world is full of terrible things/people. Being vegan is definitely much easier on certain places / around supportive communities.

I don’t think it’s binary. You can raise animals humanely (or better), avoid red meat, etc. As with political involvement / other activism, a sustained level and potential growth is better than burning out / entirely giving up.

But, collective outcomes are built on millions/billions of seemingly inconsequential actions. It helps me to focus on my direct actions versus tracking global outcomes too closely. I’m excited to install rain barrels — it won’t stop groundwater depletion or solve runoff, but it marginally improves my impact, and it’s one more example people might see / ask about walking around my neighborhood. Etc.

I’ve been enjoying listening to Braiding Sweetgrass, free on Libby. It’s a vision of how a culture can operate on care, and how that’s not incompatible with science. It does make me mourn what America has lost/destroyed. But there are also a few ideas/phrases I’ve found myself returning to our weaving into conversations.

You might stop caring about the future (please don’t), but that cow will never stop caring about its calf. Or the pigglets about their mother. Every day you remain vegan, you contribute to one less death, one less cry for help.

I think looking at the wider world is always going to be bleak. If you look, you can always find humans being terrible, killing, lying, cheating, polluting.

But the opposite is true too. Everywhere, people are fighting for justice, for love and peace. Working to provide for their families, to survive and help others. Harder to find such stories online, as misery and anger goes viral much harder than heroism.

You can’t control others. Only ever your own actions. It’s hard, to find a purpose for yourself. Survival always comes first, and while online veganism stresses purity, I think the ‘as far as is practicalable’ line in the ‘definition’ is important. You can only ever do your best, and you can only do your best while you live.

I’m not sure exactly your own outlook, on veganism, what your core drive is. But no one can live an absolutely harm-free life. It’s noble and right, to do what you can to lower that. But when speaking to what drives you, you should focus more on what you can create. Those people you have connections with in your life. Meeting and connecting with more people. I think a lot of the poison in the world, magnified by social media, can be lessened by talking with people face-to-face, finding common ground.

I’ve definitely struggled with these exact thoughts a lot in the past.

As the longer I’ve been vegan, and as I’ve gotten older too, my perspective on veganism (and other decisions I’ve made for the environment, such as being car-free) has shifted.

I used to be really motivated to try and save the world. Surely, by leading by example, and sharing the facts and science, I could inspire the people around me to make more eco-friendly decisions. While a couple people I know have slightly reduced their meat intake, or now opt for a bicycle instead of a car for the occasional commute; most people only offer excuses and refuse to put their money where their mouth is, values-wise.

My perspective is now somewhat egoist; I’m vegan (and car-free, and other things) for myself. It makes me feel better to not participate in systems which actively harm society, our planet, or any living beings. So I do it. I’ve accepted the futility of trying to keep our planet livable for our species in the face of capitalism, but it still feels better for me to be vegan.

Do you think you’d feel better if you started eating meat again?

The animals care about what you do for an extreme example you won’t just give in and rape someone because who cares the world sucks; don’t use the world’s problems as an excuse to contribute to them.

It's really exhausting. So much of our society is built on evils that have been normalized, and it's very hard to be aware of that. It's definitely a burden to go against the norm.

I think the fact that you have empathy and are trying to minimize the harm that you do proves that you're not a piece of shit. And if you're anything like me, eating meat would likely be very upsetting for you, and would make you feel a lot worse about yourself. Right now, you're acting in compassion not only for the sentient beings that you are choosing not to eat, but also to yourself, because you are living in line with your values.

And just because you can desensitize yourself to the idea doesn't really mean anything about how you actually feel.

Because if you were the one being victimised as the animals are, you’d want them to stay vegan; not have them give up and start contributing to your suffering.

Try to focus not on what others do, but on what YOU do. YOU have an actual impact on non human animals, and by not treating them as though they are worthless or consumable, you are causing less harm. You are not contributing to the ice cold panic they feel when they realize they are the next in line to get butchered, or any other short or long term suffering they go through. That is worth a lot, to the individuals spared from the suffering.

Don’t compare yourself to evil people, or uninformed people. Focus on yourself and the good/neutral you keep doing every day. You are kind, thoughtful, compassionate. What you do matters, even if the impact seems small compared to all the suffering.

You’ve been getting a lot of great emotional advice, and I’m gonna give you some social advice: get yourself some vegan friends. That will make it easier. You’ll see good every day, it will become your normal.