from eli04@linux.community to nostupidquestions@lemmy.world on 08 Dec 10:11
https://linux.community/post/3994427
several months ago I wrote about leaving floor nursing for moving patients in beds. I also posted it would mean a 20% financial hit.
Turns out the financial hit is 2%. I took the job.
Several of my former colleagues, after seeing me now that I switched jobs cannot hide their disbelief and shock. Some of the things I’ve heard: “what a waste, you can do more.” “You are a RN and you choose to move beds?”, “Haven’t you worked with us?”, “Oh no, don’t tell me you’re moving beds now.” and more.
I’ve always been very individualistic and never cared much about what others think about me. This new job means less stress and I can sleep better.
But it’s not only other RNs who tell me this: doctors as well, very knowledgeable ones.
Am I doing something wrong, when so many people, some of them much smarter than me tell me what I’m doing is stupid?
Going back to my old job doesn’t mean going back to my old department, just back to floor nursing.
#nostupidquestions
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I would be concerned that I’m locking myself out of potential future career advancement and the possibility that you’re going to be stuck on a bed mover salary for the rest of your career
my new salary now is 2% less than my old salary. I don’t see your point.
career advancement was impossible under my old circumstances
Right I’m not talking about your current salary I’m talking about the potential for your salary to grow in the future. I’m not familiar with how the medical field is structured and it sounds like you’re saying it may work opposite from how one would expect. I work in Tech sector and typically in order to get a better paying position (career advancement ) we’re looking to become more specialized and get more licenses or certifications that employers need, rather than going into a less specialized position that can be done by “anyone”.
If I remember correctly you also had big issues with your co-workers in you old position. I tell you I have made myself do more more than few times I sure wish I had done less.
You are your own career manager. Make the decisions you feel are best.
If you are happy where you are and are making enough to see to your financial needs, why would you change that?
Is it possible that this position that you are in could cease to exist?
They don’t need to understand your decision, it’s YOUR decision, not theirs. You don’t owe anyone an explanation.
If being an RN is stressing you out so much that you can’t sleep (completely understandable because that’s an extremely emotionally and mentally taxing position) then your only options really are to find a different job as you did, or perhaps have regular therapy sessions to help you through it. With your training, you can definitely find less stressful positions such as a nurse educator, consulting, public health sector. Maybe you could ask your former colleagues with a bit more experience if they know of any positions that would be less stressful for you.
Do you owe them something? If you are happier in your new job, isnt that the first priority? Also, more educated people arent necessarily smarter than you. And even if they are, the main thing is are those people worthy of your trust? I would rather trust an idiot that genuinely wishes me well than extremely smart person that has been mean to me. Have they treated you well and given you good advice before? Have they made your work experience better?
And finally, compare the payment your get now and you got on your old job. Is the difference worth the increased stress and bad sleep?
Though also consider how it will affect your future career, but you could also try looking for better work elsewhere while staying in your current work in the meantime. You should always put your own wellbeing over your job, that is how it goes otherway around too.
I dont know what these jobs are like. If you have less stress in your current job, thats an important point, but maybe not a decisive factor… Have you asked those “smarter” people why they think thats a bad decision?
It may be that people are bothered by seeing someone take decisions differently than they do, they might feel their own decisions being implicitly questioned, so they might be reacting in a way that reaffirms their own values.
If you ask them to express what is stupid about you decision you may get a better feeling for if they actually have a point or if theyre just reacting badly out of their personal insecurities or smthing.
Maybe they also want a less stressful job, but dont have the courage to face the loss in prestige/status/money, even if that woukd grant them better quality of life. Who knows…
In my last job, I rarely worked overtime. My coworkers always gave me a hard time about leaving on time. Always claimed I was leaving early. They had absolutely no reason to treat me the way they did because none of them were in a management position.
A lot of them gave me a hard time for doing a job differently. I was quicker, more organized and often my work quality was just as good or sometimes better than their work quality.
Reflecting on their behavior now that I’ve left, it’s quite clear to me that me prioritizing my personal life over work made them insecure about themselves. Not listening to their forced, unasked and unwanted advice made them insecure about themselves. Working in a way that made sense to myself made them insecure about themselves.
Guess what trend I started to piece together long after I left that awful place. When someone defies another person’s personal truth or reality, that has the potential to cause the other person to feel insecure about themselves. It seems like they can’t stand that someone else is able to do the things that they themselves are afraid of trying in the first place. Those people would rather drag you back into the same hole they are in. They don’t want your personal success or happiness to remind them of their own personal insecurities.
I’ve spent the last few years learning to be comfortable in myself when dealing with other people’s insecurities. Nothing I do will ever satisfy insecure people so I try my best to not let their words bother me. Their insecurities and feelings are not my problem. With those people, I end up giving them short and vague responses until they leave me alone. They don’t deserve anything more.
holy shit, leaving was the correct decision. I always felt I didn’t fit in because they expected me to be one of them, always subordinate to them, a useful idiot who would only work as they wanted.
I’m also glad I left. godspeed!
what an interesting point of view. I like it.
To put it bluntly…
Fuck what they think and do what makes you happy
Some people care more about money and titles than personal well being. And there’s nothing wrong with that, for THEM.
By demoting yourself, THEY think that you are now less of a person than you were before because you don’t have any extra letters after your name.
But really, a 2% pay difference is nothing, and you’re essentially making the same money to do an easier, less stressful job that results in YOU being healthier than before. They might actually be a little jealous.
correct, ironically this applies to this community as well.
And that’s why you should always ask yourself: Who has a problem?
In this instance, the old coworkers have a problem. OP does not have a problem, or at least did not claim to have one. Therefore, OP does not need to be looking for a solution.
This is also a conflict of values, not a conflict of needs - meaning that OP should just do whatever the fuck OP wants to do.
You haven’t done anything wrong at all. Just maintain your license though! There are SO many non-floor nursing jobs. Outpt, procedural, surgical, administrative, informatics, etc etc.
The floor is hell. Basically everybody who leaves inpt will never go back. Other jobs are so much better.
So all I’m saying is keep your options open. Don’t go back to nursing if you don’t like it, but if you let your license lapse you may regret it in the future.
Can just ignore them until the novelty wears off and people stop caring.
Who cares what other people say/think. Do what you feel is best for you.
I’ve decided to turn down supervisory positions because for me, for pay increase is marginal, while the increase in responsibility and stress is high. No thanks. If people think I’m stupid for that, the they can go fuck themselves.
People fail to consider that different people have different sets of values.
“why don’t you consider my values that include evicting nonagenarians?”
Your values aren’t inherently valid.
My point was just that if most people value A over B, while you value B more, people will say youre stupid when they see you getting B instead of A all the time.
They will think youre trying to get A and failing.
I’d just try to understand why they feel that way to make sure you aren’t missing anything.
Is it the pay cut? 20% sounds pretty significant to me but 2% isn’t, but in the end if you are making enough to live the way you want that’s all you need.
Is it the career path options? That can be more complicated, but if there’s nothing you would want from “climbing the ladder” that’s up to you.
Essentially what everyone else in this thread has said already but mental health > money/career prestige IMO.
In my line of work I constantly get told I’m underutilized and people always tell me I should be x or y. The thing is x and y do not align with my morals and I know I would be miserable in those jobs. I know I’d be very good at them and I understand people think they’re giving me a compliment, but I have always just wanted to have a job where I could pay my bills (which I can right now) and not have my career consume my life (which I do right now). If I went into one of the other types of jobs, the likelihood that my work/life balance would be skewed is high, or I’d be put into a position in my work where I’m enacting things that I am not comfortable with. I made my decision for myself, and if I want to “waste” my skills, that’s my fucking choice and they need to leave me tf alone.
Anyway, all that to say, fuck those guys and fuck the capitalistic hierarchial bullshit that states that your job defines your worth. You do you.
Edit: literally as soon as I posted this, went back to my feed and this was the next post <img alt="" src="https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/pictrs/image/53bcddf6-60bd-442d-8ad1-ed472bbbc474.webp">
I’ve worked for the same company for about twenty years. I’m still rank and file because I’ve repeatedly turned down supervisory roles. Like in your situation, the pay for the more stressful job isn’t much better and comes with a lot more responsibility.
Instead, I negotiated to get myself off the rota system and onto fixed hours. I am the only member of staff outside of upper management who’s on fixed hours. Literally everyone else works shifts. Middle management don’t like that, but I consistently perform well on whatever plausible metrics they dream up, I’m generally well-liked, also they can’t get rid of me because I know where the bodies are buried*.
In summary: I believe you’ve made the right choice, because I made a similar one. But it’s not my choice. The choice is yours alone.
*this is a metaphor for institutional knowledge, as far as I know there are no bodies buried in the old trolley shed behind the Inpost locker
If you’re happy you’re happy (<3 from another RN)
i’m not a medical professional but i spent months in multiple hospital rooms providing care for a parent. they had dementia and needed more care than the staff could provide. I was often there round the clock. I saw a small sliver of what nurses go through.
i can tell you that good nurses are extremely valuable. i won’t say rare but … yeah, they’re rare. the good they do for patients and the families that really need them can’t be measured in money. but it should be. they’re worth way more than the salary they get.
from the perspective of other caregivers/medical professionals, yeah it’s a shame they and those families you would’ve helped have lost you. but that’s not your fault and it’s not your responsibility. you owe yourself health above anyone else.
so yeah. they’re right that it’s “a shame”. but the shame isn’t yours, it’s the systems for undervaluing your worth by so much that they don’t pay you enough or give you enough time to recuperate and heal from the tremendously traumatic job that I know nursing can be.
as a caregiver who was asked by multiple nurses if I had medical training after watching me with my family member, good for you. I’m also sorry for those families that missed out on you but I’m so happy you’ve found a way to support yourself and be well.
bless you for everything you’ve done and fly high in whatever you choose to do next. take care of yourself.
Honestly, 2% cut is nothing. If you like your new job better for whatever reason, less stressful, more fulfilling, whatever, 2% is less than nothing, your personal life matters and should weight in.
I don’t know about your career paths, but I could see it being a problem if there was opportunity to grow in the old job but not on the new one. But everything else being the same, an insignificant pay cut to do something you like significantly more is a win in my book.