Why is Minnesota Nice a thing? Isnt that unhealthy to never have some healthy externalized agression and assertiveness when you know u gettin' fucked?
from cheese_greater@lemmy.world to nostupidquestions@lemmy.ca on 04 Jun 02:05
https://lemmy.world/post/47731335

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adespoton@lemmy.ca on 04 Jun 02:09 next collapse

Bless your heart.

That’s not quite how “nice” works.

Minnesota Nice is like an iceberg. The Trump administration is the Titanic.

cheese_greater@lemmy.world on 04 Jun 02:11 collapse

Lmao I deserved that first liner

Would you talk more about that. Im pleasantly intrigued. Is their passive aggressive game lethal + legendary to compensate?

adespoton@lemmy.ca on 04 Jun 02:50 collapse

Minnesota Nice means you’re friendly and pleasant to everyone, help out those in need, and your values actions and behavior do not change, either as an individual or as a community.

Populism, fascism and naziism work by gaslighting people and getting them to fight against each other.

It has no power over a critical mass of people who are relentlessly nice. It doesn’t matter how you redistrict, how you craft the evening news, even how many armored vehicles you roll through town or how many people you arrest. It’s real life A Bug’s Life.

Being nice doesn’t mean being a pushover. It just means eternally holding the line against hate and intolerance as a community. And Minnesota communities have learned the hard way that it’s often the only way to survive.

cheese_greater@lemmy.world on 04 Jun 02:57 collapse

Very informative and lyrical response. Thank you for that

Nemo@slrpnk.net on 04 Jun 02:52 next collapse

“Minnesota Nice” is a bullshit term made up by, I have to assume, rude Yankees who can’t understand being polite to someone one dislikes.

southsamurai@sh.itjust.works on 04 Jun 04:37 collapse

Nah, it’s like real southern hospitality. It ain’t about those assholes over there, it’s about how you choose to go through life.

Doesn’t mean you can’t be assertive. But you be assertive with manners.

Even the southern “bless your heart” isn’t what it gets made out to be. We all know damn good and well it’s a way of saying “oh wow, you’re fucked”, or “I’m better than you” some of the time, but it’s still calling a blessing on someone, and ain’t that better than just calling someone a bad name?

Minnesota nice is essentially the same. Finding a nice way to approach not nice circumstances. It’s why southerners and folks from that region get along, doncha know.

For real, try it for a while. Make a serious effort to be yourself, express your feelings and thoughts, but phrase them with manners and restraint. It works . I’m not saying there’s never a time to pull off your shirt and earrings and fuck someone up, but the less aggro you are on average, the more impact it has when you finally do pop that can of whupass.


Edit: a little of the bard to show that one can be assertive, even aggressive, without also losing one’s self.

SAMPSON

Nay, as they dare. I will bite my thumb at them; which is a disgrace to them, if they bear it.

Enter ABRAHAM and BALTHASAR

ABRAHAM

Do you bite your thumb at us, sir?

SAMPSON

I do bite my thumb, sir.

ABRAHAM

Do you bite your thumb at us, sir?

SAMPSON

[Aside to GREGORY] Is the law of our side, if I say ay?

GREGORY

No.

SAMPSON

No, sir, I do not bite my thumb at you, sir, but I bite my thumb, sir.

GREGORY

Do you quarrel, sir?

ABRAHAM

Quarrel sir! no, sir.

SAMPSON

If you do, sir, I am for you: I serve as good a man as you.

ABRAHAM

No better.

SAMPSON

Well, sir.

GREGORY

Say ‘better:’ here comes one of my master’s kinsmen.

SAMPSON

Yes, better, sir.

ABRAHAM

You lie.

SAMPSON

Draw, if you be men. Gregory, remember thy swashing blow.

They fight

Enter BENVOLIO

cheese_greater@lemmy.world on 04 Jun 05:01 collapse

What do i say to people in the hallway or laundry room of my apartment building to get them to be quiet and respectful in a public space they grossly abuse volume-wise

I find myself storming out and confronting which seems to be working but it doesnt feel great and it annoys me to no end

southsamurai@sh.itjust.works on 04 Jun 05:13 collapse

You know, it’s so lovely that you shared whatever the worst thing they were loud about with us, it’s nice to know all those little details about a neighbor.

Said with a smile, as genuine as you can make it.

cheese_greater@lemmy.world on 04 Jun 05:20 collapse

A lot of times its children screaming

This morning it was blasting music

southsamurai@sh.itjust.works on 04 Jun 06:12 next collapse

Oh, that’s time to party! You just start dancing and singing along. Join in the screaming and laughing.

cheese_greater@lemmy.world on 04 Jun 06:13 collapse

Im thinking of blasting Georgia Browns dolphin song on full blast with my portabke speaker every time getting sharper and louder and faster on repeat over time

Nemo@slrpnk.net on 04 Jun 11:11 collapse

you say, to the parents:

“Kids are a riot, aren’t they? I heard them living it up already early this morning. All that youthful energy! I wish I could still run around like that. Unfortunately I’m getting older and I need my beauty sleep, and can’t get up that early without feeling it later. I’m sure your understand how it is.”

This shows:

  • understanding of their situation without judgement

  • your needs and expectations without being demanding

  • trust in them to handle their own business now that they have this information